Vampire Bats: Want Your Blood

I’m currently standing in line attempting to cash my first paycheck in 3 months. It’s a Saturday so I expected a longer line than usual but this borders on absurd. The line is wrapped around the entire bank floor and there are about 50 to 60 people ahead of me. I can’t tell if I’m witnessing an old-fashioned depression era bank run or if this is solid proof of consumer faith in our banking system. The optimistic outlook modeled by Obama leaves me thinking that a snapshot of the crisis isn’t as grim as the caricatures rendered by corporate media outlets. Over the past few weeks I’ve come to believe that many problems can be solved with baked goods. Just as free cake was doled out generously on inauguration night, something as simple as a tray of free cookies would certainly serve to pacify my fellow impatient linemates. If this bank crisis is truly the result of waning confidence of consumers, then why aren’t steps being taken to help rebuild it? Instead me and 60 other impatient people are wasting or Saturday morning standing in line…cookieless. How come businesses are so savvy when it comes to attracting initial business but not when it comes to preserving our satisfaction? You want to ease consumer fears?  It doesn’t require hundreds of billions of dollars or even debt forgiveness.  We’re Americans…give us some free cookies, we’ll all suck our thumbs and have a good nap and sleep off this little economic cold.